By this time tomorrow, I will be in Idaho. I'm so nervous!! I don't care to fly alone, I've only done that twice....but do it I will. I'm also excited and happy, anxious, scared...yes...one day left and I'm still all of those things. It has yet to feel real...It's almost like I'm on the outside watching it all take place.
I am looking forward to seeing my Beloved again. It's been far too long that I haven't seen him. I think that is what I am most nervous about. I was very nervous the first time...and I am just as nervous now. But it's also the part I am most happy about, is seeing him again.
I know you are all wondering too...Did she tell the Ogre? Yes, he has been informed. I did not get the screaming at I was expecting...which has shocked me!!! And makes me very suspicious and apprehensive. He asked me if I was sure. Even offered to drive me to the airport. I told him it's all been arranged that it wasn't necessary. I have a sneaking suspicion that he was sort of expecting it. I'm not sure how. The girls have assured me they told him nothing. Something just seems to unsettle me about it...so I won't be resting easy until I'm on my way.
It will probably be Friday before I have my computer. I will try to check in after I'm settled from my laptop...but if not it will definitely be by the weekend.
I fully believe that the thoughts and wishes and prayers if you will that you have sent my way as it led up to the moment of telling the Ogre is what made a difference...And for that I thank you all. May the Goddess Bless you all!
Well, I will be looking forward to hearing from you, hoping everything works out with your beloved, and that you can start a new life - the way your own life was meant to be lived!!! Hugs to you!
ReplyDeleteAlso, you are *incredibly* brave and I admire you for doing this.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to leave a situation that isn't right, but yet is all that you know. I know, because I went through that last year (my marriage was not abusive or intolerable in any way; it just was not the right one for me). It was so hard to leave that comfort-zone, even though I was only "content" versus "happy".
But I did it, learned that I can love and let go of the past - that I don't have to carry the mistrust of my first husband around with my second.
You will do amazingly, because you had the balls (for lack of a better term) to take the first step.
Blessed Be!
Thanks Wendy. I too hope all goes well with my Beloved as I know that is who I truly belong with. Taking the steps to set myself on that path were hard. As you said, this was all I knew here....wrong as it is to live in an abusive situation no matter what kind it is, taking that first step to a better life is hard.
ReplyDeleteI know belong with my Beloved. With him is the only time I am truly happy in a way that I cannot be with anyone else. It's a happiness that nothing and no one else can give. I've said it many times, He had me at hello. I knew it was him before I even heard his voice, saw his face, or felt his arms around me.
Yesterday I took the first step to getting out of a situation I can no longer live in. Tomorrow I get on a plane and head off to a better life.
I am so very happy for you that everything has led up to this and you can finally start your life the way you want to love it. I hope everything goes well for you tomorrow, and I will be thinking of you! :)
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