I have mixed emotions about Thanksgiving. Sometimes I wonder what it is
we are truly celebrating. Do we really need to set aside an "official" day to be
thankful for what we have and those we love? Shouldn't that be an every day
occurrence?
It's a sad day for me. It doesn't feel like the same day any more. I used to
enjoy cooking the turkey and all the trimmings. But three years ago, on
Thanksgiving Day my grandma passed away just ten minutes or so after I left
the room to check on the stupid turkey. I should have stayed with her, not
checked on the dumb bird. There were other people in the kitchen that could
have tended to such a trivial matter.
I try to see the positive in this. But other than she is no longer in pain and
hopefully at peace... I don't see anything positive. If I could, I would just
stay in bed all day and pretend this day doesn't exist in my world anymore.
And to make matters worse, I have to spend tomorrow/later with "HIM" and his
"holy roller" sister. I'm so not looking forward to this at all.
I wish I was spending it with my beloved and his family so bad. They even
asked if I was coming. How I wish it was possible. To maybe finally feel
like I am a part of a family, a part of somewhere I truly belong.
But regardless of how I feel, I want to wish all of you a very Happy Thanksgiving.
May your day be safe, and filled with happiness, good food and loved ones.
Blessed Be!
Even if you are still there atm, you are to be with me soon, and are a part of this family, loved by each and every person.
ReplyDeleteJust do your best to remember those people that you are with are becoming a thing of the past, after this year no longer will you be forced to sit at the table with them and pretend a smile, but instead the smile will be real and a part of you.