And The Results Are In

 So................

Labs are back.
And for the most part things looked good.

Cholesterol is a little high.  They want me to try diet first.
I'm Hypothyroid.  Going to address that with medication.
Estrogen dominant.  TBD.  They said meds, but that might be on hold.

I did tell you I was diagnosed with Fibro, I think.

White Coat Syndrome is in full swing and I can't get down.
It is a little better than it was at the office, but not where I'd like it.

But I'm a jumbled mess.
I'm a nervous wreck.

Tomorrow they are doing a biopsy.
He's sure that it's horses and not zebras we're hearing.
I am sure too.  BUT...that doesn't make me any less nervous.
Even now that I know more or less what he's going to do.

I have polyps and adenomyosis.
Possible endo.  

I have three different meds to take tomorrow to make me loopy.
I've never taken any of these before.  So interesting stuff....maybe.

The results will be back in a week.  So I go back then for the low down.

Then we pick a date...I guess...I dunno.
We're taking it out.  
Guess that's going to be my birthday present.  I figure it will happen some
time in October.

And here's a thing.
He...the doctor...doesn't know my story.
But......he could tell I've been through some shit in my life.
He noticed I struggle with making decisions even after I've made one.  
He could tell that I was wavering, doubting myself.
He asked me why...so I gave him the cliff notes version.

He told me that I was capable and smart.
Then he gave me homework.
I'm to write down 3 things I like about myself every night for 30 days.
So far....I have zero.   *sigh*
At the end of this assignment, I'll have 90 things and then I'm to pick
the top 15. These he said are my core values and to guard them with my life.

It's to help me learn what I love about myself and to learn HOW to love myself.

Just if you could send some calming vibes, some strength too maybe....
I'd really appreciate it.