Sunday, June 9, 2013

Whoops! Fell Off the Blogging Train

Sorry about that....I didn't forget it's just been a busy kinda week.  I had briefly thought scheduling the posts for the week last weekend, but changed my mind.  I guess I should of done it after all LOL.  OH WELL!  No biggy.  I can and will catch up this week ( I hope :D )

This week I got to go to Whole Foods.  Oh how I love that store!  Mostly went to look and check prices.  Their produce department isn't as big as I thought it might be.  I picked up some Israeli Couscous.  I have no clue how to make it or what to do with.  I've been wanting to try couscous again, but I don't care for the finer one.  A friend suggested I try this instead.  So we'll see.

I really need to work on my weight and eat better and cut out the bad stuff more regularly.  When I came out here 2 years ago, I was 115 lbs.  Slightly underweight as I had been all my life.  Now I'm not a big junk food person (soda is probably my biggest weakness, and I've been good at limiting myself to 1 a day if I even have it).  My activity level is no different really from 2 years ago to now...yet some how I've gained more weight than I intended and I'm up to 160 lbs.  (but I don't feel like I weigh that much)  I've NEVER been that heavy in my life!  Not even 9 months pregnant with my girls, with both pregnancies I only ever hit 140 lbs. 

The thing is I don't know how to lose the 25-30 lbs I'd like to shed.  I have a lot of food allergies so I have to be careful.  I also have to be careful if I did any sort of work outs too as I have issues with my back and knees.  I honestly don't know what to do or how to start.  Suggestions?  Advice?

I've been finishing up another piece of art this week as well.  It's a piece I had penciled months ago.  I just didn't know what medium I wanted to do it in or if I even wanted to finish it.  I colored it with oil pastels.  I am going to call it done for now.  But I am happy and unhappy with it at the same time.

Friday was 2 years ago that I made one of the biggest changes in my life.  I'm adjusting to life in Idaho.  My beloved and I are doing great.  In many ways I feel like I am finally being me, coming out of my shell.  Yet in others I feel like I have more healing and more growing to do.  The biggest challenge in all of this is being away from my girls.  I miss them very much.   Accepting their choice to stay there is probably one of the hardest things I've had to do. 

As for the Ogre, I have not spoken to him since I left and haven't had any email correspondence with him since that October.  Listening to my girls, he hasn't changed at all.  I'm not surprised though. 

With the 2 year mark having passed, PMS, the New Moon, and no chocolate...I'm having those doubts of not being good enough creep in a little.  You know the little voices that say 'your arts terrible!'  'you're not worthy of (fill in the blank)'  'you're a terrible mother'  and so on and so on.  I'm really trying to keep it under control and ignore them.  I know it's mostly the moon phase and PMS.  When my cycle falls during a specific moon phase, my emotions run amuck.  Thank you hormones and Aunt Flo!!! NOT!!!!!!!!!!  I know I'll get through it.  I always do.  I'll probably end up crying on my Beloved's shoulder at some point this week because that's what usually happens.  Then he'll hug me and tell me everything will be okay and it usually is.

I'll try my best to catch up on the NaBloPoMo this week.  I know we have a couple of busy days coming up again, so I might fall behind but I'll try not to.   Have a great week!

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